The Last Minute Bail

September 29, 2019

I hate a last minute bail, they come in many forms but the last minute bail before a sports match ires the most.


I am not sure if it is a modern disease, but there is something quite “of the now” about it, a product the narcissism of the modern age.


When it comes to getting teams together for sport, more often than not you are forced to let down certain people either on the basis of talent or on a first commit first pick basis. 


And so, if selected, there is a sense of responsibility to play the game and not perform a last minute cancellation via text message. 


It is frankly a douche bag move. 


Obviously this pattern of last minute cancellation can happen across the board from wedding attendance, stags, meetings, family get togethers and the like, however there is a special place in “last minute bail” purgatory for those who do so before a sports match.


And so in honour of all of the club captains that have to cobble a team together each and every weekend, I am pleased to share the following poem:




I am so pleased that you say

That tomorrow you can play

And so congratulations, you are in the team

But that does mean

That others will miss out

So be in no doubt

If you choose to bail

And message me some cock and bull tale

I will chase you down wherever you may be

And at first batter then publicly shame thee


Team meets at 12 for 1230 Kick Off

Don't be late 


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