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Running Topless

There is a guy that lives down the road from me, he is a keen runner and can be often seen jogging in and around the neighborhood. Fair play to him, exercise is, apparently, to be applauded. Unfortunately, he chooses to run topless, something that is frankly beyond the pale. Not only does he choose to run topless, but he also seems to have mistaken his shorts for a pair of skin-tight lycra pants. As a result of this exercise sartorial nightmare, the mere sight of him running on the street is the stuff of nightmares. Sadly, it is not only this gentleman that seems to think it appropriate to run around half naked, it seems to have become an epidemic. In fact, there seems to be clear correlation between the types of men that feel it acceptable to run in skin tight lycra shorts and the type of men that also deems it acceptable to run topless. While I am by no means suggesting that such people are evil and should be deported onto there own specially assigned island, one that I would name Douche Bag Island. I would like to suggest that the rest of the fully clothed population should be allowed to tar and feather these people at every possible opportunity. This would help the half naked runners, as it would mean they would run harder and faster, so as to avoid being tarred and feathered while out on a run. And would give the rest of us the opportunity to cover these sweat covered monstrosities as and when we see them on the streets. WIN WIN

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